Devastated

We did not pass court again today...the same reason as last time, the MOWA letter did not make it. Other families with this same court date are having the same problem, I do not understand and we weren't given any answers as to why...it plain stinks and stinks bad!
Our new court date is in just a week though, the 15th, so I am asking for prayers all day everyday! Each day without him is a day too long!
On top of that bad news, the US embassy in Ethiopia are implementing more changes to how they will investigate every adoption case further after the court appointment, which could lead to another delay....pure devastation.
Micah turns 1 on the 16th of April and we wanted so bad to be holding him before then, plus Tyler is 2 on the 29th of April so we wanted to all be together for those events, but it just may not happen now....Oh I am so sad.
BUT I do KNOW that God acts only out of LOVE, He is LOVE so he can only act in LOVE, so while it doesn't feel like it now, He is loving us and He loves Micah and one day we will all be together. PLease pray for peace and strength for us as we continue on this bumpy road....and for this next court date to be a success
Third times a charm right!? RIGHT??!!!! RIGHT???!!!! :)

No news yet!

Well...still no news from our agency!
I am taking that to mean that they haven't recieved any news from Ethiopia, our case worker has been with us the whole way and I know she would have called already if she knew anything.
I am at total peace though, beyond peace really, kind of like a little excitment for somthing I can't explain!
All I can do is hope that the delay is working in our favor (I have seen God turn so many delays and detours into glorious outcomes!)....like perhaps they are waiting until the official court decree is done and sent to the US embassy, which would mean we'd be ready to travel and SOON I hope! :)
Only God knows and for now that's all I know! :)
I will keep everyone updated! Thanks for all your prayers and please keep them up!

ROUND 2!

Well I am asking any who read this to pray for our second court date, this Sunday night! We are longing for good news on Monday that Micah is officially ours!!
We wanted to get to travel for the March 22nd embassy appointment but it is very unlikely now, I am not limiting my God, just letting you know what we have been told by our agency. While you're praying, you coud pray that we bust any deadlines in paperwork and that all our documents are sent to where they need to be very quickly and we actually are holding our Micah on March 21st....I am living moment by moment in the peace that my God is bigger than any deadline, bigger than anything my heart throws at me, and that HE ULTIMATELY KNOWS EVERYTHING AND ACTS ONLY OUT OF HIS LOVE FOR US!
He loves Micah MORE than we do (though it seems impossible!) and wants him home with us as much as we do, I take rest in this!
Thank you for joining us in prayer as we fight any delays Satan throws our way to keep us from glorifying God through this adoption, a real life testimony to the adoption of US by our HEAVENLY FATHER!
To HIM be the GLORY!

Rescheduled :(

Well this isn't the post I'd hoped to be writing, but we didn't pass court! Instead we are rescheduled for March 8th , exactly 2 weeks from now.
I know God is showing me that I must mean what I say when I say "I trust Him" and I do...it isn't always easy, but I do trust Him and I know He can turn what seems like detours in my "perfect plan" into GLORIOUS OUTCOMES for HIS PERFECT PLAN. He has shown me this time and time again and so I rest in His grace. He has carried us this far and will continue to.

I am reminded of the story mentioned on Sunday of Shadrack, Meshack, and Abindago (didn't look up spelling!)....when asked if they would serve the idol before them, they said "No, God will save us, and EVEN IF HE DOESN'T save us, we still won't serve your idol!"

So I am challenged and growing and learning to say YES to God...EVEN if things don't go the way I want them to, I will praise Him and thank Him for acting out of Love and "working all things together for the good of those who love Him."

I am reminded of how Tyler acts lately when getting his diaper changed...he wants to run and throw a fit when he knows he needs to be changed and cleaned, how will I respond when God wants to change and clean me? The diaper changing process is sooo much smoother when he submits and lets me clean him up instead of fighting me....I hope I no longer run from God but submit and allow Him to change and clean me!
(Maybe that's not the most glorious example but hey, that's my life right now!) :)

Tomorrow Night!

Tomorrow Night is THE Night!!
So our court date is Monday the 22nd, but because Ethiopia is about 8 hours ahead of us, then tomorrow night while we're sleeping a judge will be going over all our information and Micah's information and asking questions and then deciding if we are officially, legally, Micah's PARENTS!
To really think about it all is too much for me, all I can do is put it in the hands of the Ultimate Judge and pray He moves the hearts of all those involved so we are named Micah's parents officially and we can begin planning to travel!!!
So if you are reading this, I ask you to pray tonight on Micah's behalf, our behalf, for his birth mom, for the judge and all other persons involved so that we will hear we PASS COURT and can move forward. Should we not pass this time, we would be rescheduled for another date and hope to pass again...but I can't think about that! We may get to know on Monday the results, but it could take a few days.

Lord,
Only you know the outcome on Monday, I give you my anxiety and lay my desires at your feet asking you to help me trust You through it all. I ask that all the documents arrive, no papers are lost, that Micah's birth mom makes it safely and is at peace, that all questions are answered correctly and that when it is all done, we hear that we are legally Micah's parents. You know we have been his parents for a long time now in our hearts and we ask that now it will be made official! Thank you God for that sweet little boy, and though he has no idea what will be going on and how it will all affect him, I pray you prepare his little heart for all the overwhelming love that is headed his way!!!

Mark your calendars!!!!

We have a court date!! February 22nd!! Whooo!

I guess you could say we're excited :) OF COURSE WE ARE!
We really didn't wait THAT long for the news of our court date, but it just felt that way since we had to wait for lab results before we could move forward in the process.
Should all go smoothly, and nothing changes (which we all know isn't always the case) then we could be traveling for the March 22nd embassy appointment. Meaning.....
Our precious Micah would be in our arms the day before! March 21st could actually be our "gotcha day"! I still can't believe we have come to this point....the waiting just might end one day! I can see the light! :)
So we are asking for continued prayer over this process, lots of things have to go right for a court appointment to "pass" meaning Micah is LEGALLY our son...
*approval from the Ministry of Women's Affairs has to have arrived at court by our appointment
*approval from Central Authority (similar to a child protection agency who makes sure all is right with Micah's relinquishment) has to have arrived by our appointment
*Micah's birth mom has to make it there for the appointment and it is said to be about an 8 hour bus ride for her to the court
*His birth mom has to answer questions correctly and have correct ID
~Once all this takes place and we are given the news that we "PASSED" we start travel plans!

WHEW! ALOT TO PRAY ABOUT! I know those of you who read this will earnestly pray on sweet Micah's behalf and my heart is overjoyed to know that we serve the ULTIMATE JUDGE who makes all things right!!
And in case you are wondering, Cristie (you know my new BFF #1 whose son is in the same room as our in Ethiopia) has a new court date on Feb. 17th...just 4 days before ours! We aren't sure about how that will all play out in our travel plans, but I ask you pray for their family to pass their court date too! Should we get to travel together it will be amazing...should they get to go before us, she will have extra luggage full of hugs and kisses for special delivery to our Micah! :)
Our God acts only out of His never ending, unlimited LOVE FOR US!
Thank you God!

This time last year...

I thought I would share with you the journal entry I have read over and over again during this past year...it is has helped me through hard days and encouraged me when I needed it. It is a prayer I wrote to God almost exactly a year ago. Since right now I have had to fight the "poor me's" over not yet having a court date so we can be one step closer to our Micah, I thought I needed a reminder at how far God has brought us in just a year's time and maybe it will encourage others and above else bring glory to my God...

Jan 28, 2009
God,
I want so badly to hear YOUR voice...to hear you say clearly to me that my desire to adopt is from you, not something I have selfishly dreamed up to make myself happy or attempt to fill some void that I may have. I ask Lord that you will make clear to me your desires. I know that Matt is not at the same point as I am on this..he is unsure about it and doesn't understand. I can not ask him to bring another baby into our lives unless he is clearly with me on doing so. So I pray Lord that is it be your desire for us to adopt a child, that Matt will let me know. I know his faith is in You and You are powerful and your mighty Spirit can ignite passions in someone with a fierce blaze. So I pray that will be what happens...that Matt will be drawn to you and when he is where he can hear you and feel you, that you will make it known to him that we are to adopt.
I long for it all to happen soon, very soon, but I know that if I try to run things it will get all messed up, so please guide me Lord, speak to me so I can hear what you want me to do, let me know it is word from You and not myself.
As I felt when I learned I was pregnant with Tyler...feeling the power of having something growing inside me, feeling like I would do anything for this child inside my womb, like I had been given a priceless treasure to carry for a while, is how I feel now. I feel like a child is growing in my heart. He or she may not even be born physically yet, but in my heart there is a baby growing and I will do anything to get to it, to bring it safely into our home. Please guide me Lord, you know my heart and my soul, please search them and make them ready for what You have in store. May this baby in my heart cause me to glorify you and lead others to You. For now I will continue to trust in you and that You will let me know what is next and when the time is right, may I speak to Matt about these things at Your ordained moments. God you know my desires, may they be in accord with Your desires! For all this is in the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen!"

Isn't that special!!??
Things that stick out to me...
~First -I kept asking God to make sure it was HIS desire and not MINE! Well, if I had know that adoption was such a refelction of God's adoption of us, I would have known that no desire that wonderful could have ever been born from my sinful self...I knew all along it was God's desire, I was just scared to admit that for fear of really HAVING TO OBEY!!
~Second - around that same time frame, I began small and frequent, not high emotional conversations with my husband about these desires and I didn't know it at the time but he began to pray for God to change his heart and give him a desire for adoption! How amazing and what a lesson...how often do I ask God to CHANGE MY HEART?! I so often find myself asking God to change HIS plans and make them into what I want, but my precious husband knew where to start and began asking God to change him into what He wanted him to be instead of praying "God please get Angie off my back about this stuff! She is crazy!" :)
~Third - When I began praying about our future son...I know now that he in fact wasn't born yet, actually his birth mom was about in the stage of her pregnancy when she should have been feeling him kicking and growing alot more (5-6 months along) it is no surprise that this is the time I really began to feel him growing and "kicking" in my heart! He was born in April of 2009 and in May of 2009 we began the process not knowing it would be January of 2010 before we knew he was!

This has been a sweet reminder as to how much God has held us in His hands during this whole process. I hope it is also an encouragement to any other moms or dads who feel that tug to adopt or do something that seems crazy and are waiting on the heart's of their spouses to feel the way they do...you can trust that God will move in them at the perfect time.
I am convicted for having the "poor me" attitude! I serve an AMAZING GOD who works out everything for His will and our good, what is there to be doubtful about!?
I can't wait for a year from now...Only God knows what kind of crazy post I will have to blog about! :)